Introduction to shifting hard emotions: Emotional Mastery series

There are so many ideas and myths out there about what emotional mastery looks and feels like, that I wanted to take the time to set some things straight. I'm starting with a little of my story. As we go through this series, we'll take a look at why emotional master is so important, what it really means, and how to begin working with your emotions on a whole new level.

 

In the space of one year my life had almost completely fallen to pieces. I’m not even exaggerating. I spent months on end on the point of breaking. My family was no longer what I thought it was. Forced lifestyle changes killed the business I had had. Court hearings, lawyers, money flying out the door. Then we lost our primary source of income.  I spent months in deep resentment, anger, gnashing my teeth at the world and the various sources of of my angst. I thought I had lost everything, basically, and I didn’t know who I was anymore. Very little got better on it's own with time.

There is a point where I realized all my internal feelings didn’t mean squat. Feeling all those feels so deeply every single time they came up didn’t change anything, or if it did change something, it didn’t change for the better. Acting from that pain place never got me the results I wanted or expected. But I still didn’t know how to heal from it, how to let go, how to find comfort and peace within myself from all that had gone askew. All I really knew was that staying in that active grieving/anger stage was going to kill me and everything I loved right along with it.

 

I realized that if I had any chance of creating a life I really wanted to stand up for at some point in the future, then I had to start getting a grip. I knew there was no way to simply stop feeling. The more I was able to simply sit still my pain feelings, the more guidance I heard about that feeling. But now I had two conflicting voices in my head. One voice for all the world sounded like “realistic”, if not pessimistic.The other voice sounded like “hope”. I so wanted to resist hope, I didn’t want to set myself for more pain. But I did tell hope, “Maybe. Probably not today, or even this week. But there will be movement on this at some point.”

Pin me!

even fear and heavy emotions are sources of guidance and strength

Even fear and heavy emotions are sources of guidance and strength.

Even fear and heavy emotions are sources of guidance and strength. Click To Tweet

That "maybe: changed everything. The change wasn’t instant. It wasn’t all healing. But in retrospect, I see is that I was opening the door to deeper guidance. That sense of hope, it wasn’t just another opinion in my mind. It was Divine guidance, an intuitive hit, a precognition of how a potential could play out. I had resisted because I didn’t recognize it as Truth. I thought it was wishful thinking, based on my desire to have everything feel resolved and harmonious again. But it was long-term plan guidance, maybe not today. Things were heading in that direction, maybe not tomorrow, but I have to prepare myself to meet this potential.

 

I also resisted. I thought accepting the situation as it was, would mean that I accepted an outcome I didn't or wouldn't like. I now see perfectly how that was fear talking smack. That knowledge helps me to see how fear might be talking smack in my present. This isn’t about ignoring your feelings or burying them. It’s about being present with them and knowing that you still need to make choices. It’s about being able to say, “if my anger isn’t getting this situation better, what will? And what do I need in order move through this shit, cuz I want to be flowing, not stuck?”

myths about emotional mastery

Being sensitive doesn’t mean we are meant to suffer. Our emotions aren’t meant to weigh us down or rule our lives. They are sacred. They are guidance. But they aren’t the part of you that has to make the powerful, life-changing decisions you need to make in order to rise and grow.

 

It’s time to learn how to fierce and sensitive, true to your feelings, yet ready to create change.

 

As we continue in this series on Emotional mastery, we'll take a deeper look at how our deep feelings are actually the source of strength and personal magick in this life.

The secret relationship between emotional pain and intuition

The secret relationship between pain and intuition

This article, about the relationship between pain and intuition, is part of a series about the main 4 block to intuition and also the Emotional Mastery Series. I took two weeks off during the writing of this series (1st article and 2nd article of the Intuition block series), as I had gone through my own bout of pain, struggle, and anxiety. I bless that period of time now, as it really brought home the point of this series in such a profound way that I feel like a clear, laser-focused, on the deepest truth of this life experience.

Let me start off by saying that I am only speaking of emotional pain. I am not speaking of physical pain from injury, disease, or disorder, I am not doctor in any way, and can only speak from my experiences and insights received as an intuitive. That all being said, what I learned during my break was that pain is the experience we have, and we all share it, that something has been taken away from us or the fear that we will somehow lose something. It is the knee jerk survival mechanism that warns us that way in some way be diminished by an encounter, argument, or situation, perhaps even diminished to the point of injury or death.

While emotional pain is a natural reaction, it is not natural for us to hold on that pain. That holding on to pain puts stress on the body that can ultimately weaken and damage the body. The stress of carrying our pain certainly will begin to effect our daily lives, sleep and eating patterns, and we will continue to decline and feel worse.

Pain, or fear of emotional pain, is the root cause of our emotions and behaviors. Yet it is not the pain, in and of itself, that causes the most disruption and damage in our lives. The point of pain is to lead us back to oneness. Like it’s sibling fear, pain shows us where we need love and more healing. It is ego’s response to pain that is the most disruptive to our lives and healing.

Ego is a natural structure, or maybe function, in our minds and consciousness. It allows us to safely experience and learn about the world around us. When we experience things, even pain, ego seeks to explain the reason we feel it and helps us to figure out if something is harmful or helpful. Being that ego only really deals with physical world issues, it only is half the equation, as we are not only physical beings. So as long we resist coming into our natural intuitive state, embracing and coming into alignment with our multi-dimensional soul, we are only getting about half the story about any experience we have, whether it pain, fear, happiness, or joy. While feelings states like happiness and joy are closer to the vibration and state of intuitive soul connection, even they aren’t fully an expression of soul centeredness. We can feel joy and happiness for all the wrong reasons.

force shame out of hiding, giving our pain the light

The longer we stay entrenched in the day to day living beyond this physical plane, the easier it becomes to accept pain and fear as our very real, very deeply reality. The deeper and more frequently we experience this reality the crazier ego becomes in attempting to figure out the pain and solve it. Of course, when firmly entrenched in the physical world view, we all see how it can make sense. Yet ego’s explanations will never fully account or be able to fully heal our pain because it is just one part of us. And because ego is in overdrive trying to resolve our pain, ego also fails to point out that we aren’t the only one’s in pain. The experience of ego and pain, left unchecked by soul and the intuition state, makes it hard to see that our pain isn’t as personal to us as we would believe.

If fact, in those moments of unchecked fear and pain, we seem to all believe that our pain is so real and painful that no one else could possible understand or have experienced this level of darkness and hurt. We fall under the illusion that we are so deeply flawed and lacking we cannot or should not be part of the world around us, or that there are parts of us that should never see the light of day again…or the light of Divine Love. We create our shadow sides, because we have believed the stories ego has fed us, that our pain makes us ugly and unacceptable…some how different.

But the opposite is more true. We are one in our experience of pain. It is through the realization of Oneness that we experience the healing of our pain. Brene Brown’s work on vulnerability beautifully explains that when we can embrace our pain and begin to become vulnerable, to share our pain experience, that we become healed. From an energy level, it makes complete sense, that being vulnerable and sharing would lead us to our healing and Oneness. When we believe ego, it tells us we are alone, flawed, broken, should not show our pain, we close ourselves off. We try to close off the energy of that wound, sometimes we create divisions within ourselves to keep that wound hidden in shadow. But when we share things, our energy opens back up again and the potential for light and love to reach our deep inner pain is possible again.

Our deeply held wounds and emotional pain, are those places within ourselves that we (or ego) has deemed fit to never see the light, when it is the light (our soul, intuition state, the open flow between us and the world around us) that is the cure to our pain. By denying our soul selves and Divine Love, we only keep ourselves in pain.

The soulful, intuition state is the antidote to our emotional pain. Click To Tweet

When the magic of the holidays isn’t so magical

HolidayMadness2

As I’m writing this post, it’s a little over two weeks until Thanksgiving weekend, and a little less than two months till Christmas. I don’t have one present yet, haven’t set my plans for Thanksgiving, and already feel a little flummoxed about how to fit everything in! Most years I try to plan ahead, at least a little. I’ve picked up gifts throughout the year as I found interesting things for people I love and planned larger purchases on special sale days. I have a blended family, so we didn’t always get to spend the actual holiday days together, usually that meant we got to celebrate everything twice, at least! For years, to me, the holidays meant gearing up to be my most organized and thoughtful self.  Being sensitive and an empath, I knew not everyone put in as much energy, thought, and planning into having those specials as I did, but at the end of the day I usually felt okay that I did it. I appreciated it, even if others were less than appreciative.  I felt bound and determined to spread the holiday spirit even if I had shove my magic of the holidays glitter down their throats. The phrase “you’re going to be happy, whether you like it or not” comes to mind.  😉

Ouch, really? Is that any kind of magic to spread??

And while I still feel that compulsion to share, I know very well, and want to put out the reminder that the magic of the holidays isn’t about one day of the year, or gifts, or religion, or even family. It’s about us and the light we put forth. All circumstances come down to the light we, and others, chose to forth. This holiday season, I want to ask you

What kind of light will you put forth?

In spite of

  • all public places being wild with people of all sorts of energies, and maybe having issues with crowds
  • the rush of getting everything done in time
  • money concerns
  • non-stop christmas carols, tv programs, sales, and commercials driving one to the brink of mind numbing maddness
  • schedule  and routine interrupt, with no school, no work, and travel days
  • too much rich food and alcohol all at once, throwing digestive systems into disarray
  • too little sunlight
  • difficult and drama-filled family events, or no family to speak of to be with
  • still grieving or feeling down
  • getting burnt out and ill
  • not enough parking spaces, public bathrooms, or sales clerks EVER

how will you put the magic out there? How do you want to feel while holding this energy for others?

OMG!! My YL essential oils kit is here!!

2015-10-27 14.59.06

My Young Living Essential Oil Starter kit is here!! Up until today I had just a few samples from my friend who is a Young Living distributor and customer. About a week and half ago we decided it would be utterly fantastic to do the essential oils biz together and I sat very impatiently waiting for my own kit to arrive. She and I are both into wellness and spirituality. Andrea, my friend, is more into the all natural and life improvement aspects, and while I certainly support that in anyone’s life, I love how versatile the products are. Using essential oil is definitely a way to make a statement about one’s commitment to natural health and home life, but everything I’ve heard about and witnessed from the Young Living products lead me to believe Young Living has to be one of the most high vibration life-affirming businesses out there. It reminds of how Bach Flower remedies are made, waiting for the peak time to harvest, assuring that everything is done from planting to consumption to keep the potency and life-force of the plant essence alive. And because it’s plant based there is almost no end to the ways in which you can use them in your life.

Enough about that though, I could talk forever about high vibe supplements and helpers (plants, crystals, and so forth).  The box arrived and settled down to unpack everything. I’ll start with my starter kit. It came in a pretty box that made me think my kit was the most special thing on Earth. It feels like a little treasure chest of wellness and goodness.  There are two layers to the box, the top contains the majority of my oils, the bottom had mostly the business starter set with samples, give-away cards, little bottles to give people oils of your to try. The whole concept around the box is about trying and sharing, so that’s just what I did. I tried out Purification in my new diffuser, and I didn’t even need to use the whole recipe to make the whole living smell and feel wonderful!
2015-10-27 14.55.01

Then I moved on to playing with and smelling each of the oils themselves. As I sat with my product information card and the adorable bottles, I began to see the potential. My crafty, tinker gnome mind went into overdrive as I realized all the ways I could use these oils. I began to wonder how I get ALL of the oils Young Living sells. The beautiful part is that there is no gimmick. No fancy-schamcy way to sell these beauties or even make them useful. Each of those bottles feels like a needed friend, like the way I feel about my stash of crystals and my BFF’s. Once you experience what these oils can do for you, you’ll get it. You’ll want your own little treasure chest of oily goodness.

And I didn’t even mention the cost value of the kit. I paid $160 for my box and the diffuser…and that was $160 to start selling these oils too, not just for the kit itself. That’s a good deal in today’s MLM market itself, I’ve heard some starter kits going for way way way more. But that’s also the price for a chest full of wellness supporting supplements that my body will LOVE! Sure the bottles look little, but when you’re only using a drop or two at a time, the cost doesn’t feel like an issue because they are effective AND they last. There are quite a few options for getting a starter kit too, the basic starter kit, with no diffuser, no other health

And a side note, these essential oils are super concentrated, you really only need a few drops. While I was waiting for my kit, I had used the sample of peppermint oil in my coffee one day….WOWZERS was it strong. My whole family smelled peppermint for the next four hours, which is not necessarily a bad thing, just way too much for one cup of coffee. I could have used half, maybe less than the little sample provided!

Value: priceless!!

Quality: priceless!

My wellbeing: priceless!

If you’re interested in selling and using these oils yourself, get a starter kit!

If you don’t care about selling, but really want to get into essential oils and their benefits, get a starter kit!

Click on the graphic below and then navigate to the home-based business opportunity section!

I want my own kit! copy

If you need help getting signed up or selecting a kit, contact me!!

Am I a sensitive or psychic? What labels do you resonate with?

more than my tiny body

Over the course of my vocation as a soul reader, I have often been asked whether I thought someone was an empath, a sensitive, a medium, or even a psychic.  Ultimately, I greatly dislike that type of question and I rarely give the answer anyone wants to hear. But here’s why.

It doesn’t matter what kind of label you apply to yourself. What matters is how you feel about that label and what you expect that label means to you. It also matters whether or not you are accepting the possibility of having a heightened sense or ability. I am the type of person who would rather avoid all labels, but I also realize that avoiding general labels is nigh on impossible. We need words to talk about what we think, feel, and experience. But I do maintain to all my clients that in end, labels are just words that kind lump some patterns or expectations together. Labels cannot define all of who we are.

Generally speaking, if a person seems open to considering a label like empath, psychic, HSP, or even medium, I encourage their exploration of what that label means to them. If they are in denial, I can usually agree that a label is a label is a label, meaning that it’s just a word. I also ask them to consider that no one label is going to cover it all. There are people who consider themselves Christian Witches no matter how dichotomous that might seem to others. There is no one who can honestly say one is bad or “doing it wrong” if you are both a person who works with the shadow self AND is also happy, or if one a healer AND also experience strong emotions. In the world of spirit is room for “AND thinking”.

So are you a HSP, a psychic, medium, or empath? Only you can answer that with any certainty. I tend to think most people have some kind of innate sensitivity. It doesn’t necessarily mean anything more than recognizing that part of you. But other feel called to only understand that side, but also to align with it as their vocation in life. Sure there are signs, like a certain glow about a high energy person, or even small signs like precognitive dreams or gut feelings. But then again, sometimes the real ability is so innate it’s hard to pin down with talking to another who has similar experiences. It took 21 years, or so, to understand I wasn’t just making up conversations in my head when the house quieted down for the night. For 21 years, it never really occurred to me that other sensitives might also be to tap into the conversations I thought I was making up. But once I knew, I knew. There was no more resistance. No need for external validation. I simply and peacefully knew the truth of it.

I knew I was soul that was highly connected and attuned to the Divine and the Universe. No more, no less. It didn’t come to down what labels with which I was comfortable. The point at which I knew I was more, relied upon being centered into the connection I was just learning I held. I am an entity of energy, who sees and reacts to the energy of other and the world around me. Not only am I larger than my challenges and feelings, I am larger than one label can convey.

No matter which labels you resonate with, make sure you are being YOU, all of YOU!

How do you know you are highly connected to the Divine and the Universe? Tell me how you receive guidance about this in the comments below!!

Being open and an empath: Part 1 What are you shielding from?

 

what are you shielding from

Way back when I began to realize my empathic nature, one of the first things I was told I needed to learn was shielding. After many years of living my own path, I must say this was all the wrong advice for someone with sensitivities and empathy. My empathy and sensitivities are best expressed in terms of openness, flows, ebbs, and signal strength…all ideas and concepts that have little to do with hiding behind an energy barrier.

The more I struggled with shielding:

  •  the harder things would hit me,
  • the less me I was,
  • the less people were able to really help me, because I was becoming more and more disconnected and hidden away.

 

When the anxiety and panic attacks hit, and yes, I do think there was a correlation, it nearly broke me. I was no longer the person who could follow the flow and see where it led. I was barely able to process everything that was being held inside, much less filter or process others. My nerves and sensitivities were rubbed raw and I had no way to buffer anymore because my energy was in such disarray, scattered to the point of almost being non-existent.

The heavier the wall I tried to put in place:

  • the less I was able to get all the good energies I needed,
  • the nuances of psychic hits were lost on me,
  • the more bottled up and overwhelmed I felt,
  • the more my peace of mind and confidence deteriorated.

 

The longer I tried to hold the wall, the longer I spent locking it in place, even holding on to negativity. Because I was shielding based on negative thinking, I was shielding out of fear. All sorts of fear, fear of being hurt, of not being able to recover from yet another painful experience, from the unknown of someone’s reaction, of being completely misunderstood, judged, demonized. From a perspective of fear, shielding makes total sense. But with that came the price of no longer being the free spirit I had been.

There had to be a better balance, than shielding, because I no longer wanted to live in that fear state.

From a perspective of fear, shielding makes total sense. But I don't want to live in fear! Click To Tweet

What I did learn was that negativity won’t kill me. Negativity is going to make it past shields because I’m an empath. I feel the innate wrongness of negativity and so tune it in to understand it better. I’m going to keep seeing in much the same way a teacher notices grammar mistakes. I’m going to want to fix it, heal it, shift it. Especially if that negativity is coming from a loved one, friend, or someone I spend a lot of time around.

don't spend life in a bubble. Crack it and start living.

 

Understanding this tendency and inclination in empathy is important. There will always be choices to make for how we handle ourselves and the input presented to us. But building a wall is like building a dam on a much-needed river. I need that river, my intuitive empathic nature, in order to be able to make the shifts and transformations back to center, my Divine nature…in short for the empathic ability to be used to the fullest extent.

Click to see Part 2 of this article series, where I delve a little further into how being in center and in Divine love is the answer to shielding and fear-based thinking!!

Are you struggling with your abilities and gifts, my intuitive coaching can help stop the struggle!

click-here-to-learn-more

 

3 ways to stop feeding overwhelm

06a22c2e-a99c-457a-9aa3-b89fadee8c74OtherImage

 

Anyone who wants to live a full and joyful life, a super powered life, needs to learn some coping skills for dealing with overwhelm. Sometimes things really do feel so hard we can’t get through it, sometimes our dreams seem way to large to even take the first step! When that happens our first step should be to stop feeding the overwhelm.

Get the scoop on the 3 ways we feed overwhelm in this podcast!

Miss seeing my smiling face?  Subscribe my youtube channel! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCQ8EOIY1vunkKw-Ed6SVcqQ

Know anyone else who is having a hard dealing with their overwhelming life? Share Super Secret Powers!

Powered by WishList Member - Membership Software