How to know if you need some boundary work

Do you even have any idea what your boundaries are?

 

For Empaths and Intuitives, sometimes boundaries can be a tricky issue.  If you are stuck in caregiver, fix-it, or ultimate healer mode, then most likely your boundaries can use some strengthening. 

For me boundaries are the edges of our comfort zone, the space where our natural resilience or place of power rests. When we go through a dark night, period of low vibe, or even depression, our boundaries are going to be low as well. We won't have the natural buffer or tolerance for tackling challenges. But when are feeling good, flowing, and high-vibe, we can take more on and get more stuff down. Boundaries are directly related to how we feel!

Here are some common misconceptions about boundaries:

  • They are static, never changing: We change our minds and hearts many times in life. Our boundaries and comfort zones changes as we do. What might be a real problem for us, can see easy-peasey to deal with in our 30's. 
  • There is always one fixed boundary to hold: That is an ideal, not reality. Each day we wake in new situations, new energies, new circumstances. We can't expect our boundaries to always be in the same place, much like we can't always count on our emotions being in the same place. We have to learn to lean to what feels flowing and comfortable each day, and seek to expand a little outside our comfort zone when we're feeling a little contracted or it feels like our energy has shrunk.
  • Boundaries keep us safe: This is much like thinking a magick wall or bubble of energy will actually stop bad guys from hurting us. It doesn't work like that on this physical plane. Boundaries, like our emotions are signal for when we are in and out of comfort zone, no more, no less. It's important information to have, but it's not all that a lot of books about psychic protection make it out to be. 

Here are some quick tips to know if you need boundary work!!

How to know if you need more boundary work

 

You need boundary work if:

You feel overwhelmed

You need boundary work if:

You feel rushed or pushed to make a decision or response.

You need boundary work if:

You feel attacked, defensive, like someone is trying to blame, judge, or push their energy or opinion on you.

How to work with your boundaries:

  1. Recognize you are getting some boundaries signals.
  2. Identify what is being triggered in you, what emotions are you mirroring? What is the cause or fear you or the other person is reaction?
  3. Ask yourself whether you agree or disagree with the line of thought, conclusion, or judgment. Is the fear based on any facts whatsoever?
  4. Give their fear love, give yourself love, and bless the situation around their fear. Remember it might not be yours to fix, but if you can show them you understand their fear, you can usually diffuse the knee-jerk reaction taking place.

expand your boundaries

 

This technique works because it raises our vibe and keeps us from absorbing the other person's emotions, reality, and/or fear. Our boundaries get triggered because we feel we are about to lose something, our time, our energy, our sense of comfort. Most times we have a knee jerk reaction to that kind of thing. But if we can come into awareness about what is happening, we can center back into our comfort zone and start to expand our boundaries so we can handle more. Being able to receive more in life is one of the keys to manifestation that can accelerate your dreams!!!

I am an Intuitive Spiritual Master life coach, helping those who need help developing their life purpose, passions, and gifts! I work with people who want to be their own Super hero and discover their Super Secret Powers. I have my Master coaching certs in Spirituality coaching, Confidence coaching, Life purpose and Passion coaching, Laser coaching, and Fear and Anxiety coaching through IICS. Let's discover how your super secret powers will change your life and your world today!

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